Lessons from My Toddler
As terribly cliché as it sounds, being a mom has truly been my life’s greatest journey. In fact, starting this platform and looking for ways to level up in my life are all inspired by becoming a mom. There is so much I want to teach my daughter, but more often than not I find that she is the one teaching me. Like today. Something happened at the park today that has happened so many times before. Something about today, however, made it all click.
My daughter Isla is two and is naturally asserting her independence at every opportunity she gets. One of the ways she is exploring this new concept is by climbing all over everything she can without assistance. As any parent can attest to, it is simultaneously scary and amazing to watch your little person gain confidence and find her footing (literally and metaphorically). Today’s particular park is one we’ve visited quite regularly over the summer and with each visit Isla has become more self-assured on the various structures, needing help on some of the bigger or higher things less and less. As she was climbing up one of the ladders today, she insisted that she would do it alone. Again, amazement and fear take over all at once. This ladder had a tricky curve to it, what if she fell? Still, I stepped back and let her lead the way. After the first couple rungs she overheard another child crying and turned to see what was happening. The distraction caused her to slightly misstep, but she didn’t fall and eventually returned to the climb ahead of her. Again, something else stole her attention, and she misstepped. With a bit of gentle encouragement, she redirected her focus to the climb. Once refocused on her goal, she surely and swiftly climbed to the top of the ladder with no trouble at all. Heart bursting with pride, I suddenly realized the metaphor of it all.
When you set a goal or take on a new challenge, something inside you says that you can do it. You are confident and excited to make the climb. But somewhere along the way there are other voices that pull for your attention and cause you to misstep or stumble, and those distractions don’t serve you in your journey. The more the voices pull focus away from yourself, the harder it is to take the next step. This could be someone telling you the reasons why you won’t succeed, it could be your own self-doubt, it could be the comparisons you make between yourself and others going after similar goals. And unfortunately we live in a time where the other voices can get inside your head all too easily. When you’re able to drown out the noise and stay centered on your own voice is when you reach the top. I guess what I’m really trying to say is that we’re all just two-year-olds at heart, trying to make our way up the ladder without falling.
In all seriousness, set goals for yourself and block out the noise. People will always talk, social media isn’t going anywhere and there will be people to compare yourself to endlessly. Focus on you and stay focused on you. With one foot in front of the other and careful but thoughtful steps, you’ve got this. As Glennon Doyle says, we can do hard things.